December 3, 2007 – It’s The Shady World Leader Extravaganza!

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All the shady world leaders came out of the woodwork this weekend for (much dreaded, I’m sure) elections — that time when all the idiots over whom they lord have an opportunity to briefly express themselves.  At least that’s probably how they see it.

 Let’s go to Russia first, where Vladimir Putin’s party won about 64% of the parliamentary vote.  Personally I think it was his sexy glamour shots featuring various phallic symbols that put him over the top.

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The US is asking Russian authorities — presumably the same authorities that jailed the opposition leader, Kasparov, a week before the election — to investigate.  Because that totally makes sense.

Vladimir Putin (that would be “Pootie” to me and George Bush) isn’t allowed to stick around past his final presidential term, which is over soon, but it looks like he may find a way:

“Putin is constitutionally prohibited from running for a third consecutive term, but he clearly wants to remain in power even though he has ruled out changing the constitution to allow him to run for another term as president. A movement has sprung up in recent weeks to urge him to become a “national leader,” though it’s not clear what that would mean.”

I bet Pootie can make it happen.  He’s a “do-er” — polonium powered!  As for the US straightening him out — it’s not going to happen, because Pootie isn’t threatening to nuke the US or Israel.   He’s just playing big brother to that nutcase Ahmadinejad in Iran who wants to, making him a bit further down the list.

Besides, I’m sure the last thing Bush needs now is to be fighting the Cold War over again, while dealing with the war on terror.  It would be the only problem Ronald Reagan faced that Bush ISN’T having to deal with so far in his tenure.

On the other side of the world, Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez held a referendum in an attempt to make himself “president for life“.  Turns out that not everyone in Venezuela is as big of a fan of Hugo as he is of himself — a 51% defeat in Venezuela, where the elections are dodgier than a KIA transmission, is pretty much a landslide.

Looks like he’ll have to find another way to stick around forever now.  He and Pootie have the same problem.  Maybe they should hold a Comrade Convention.  Or, I guess, they could wait until they can meet up at the next United Nations gathering — same diff.

Ever notice that the track suit is the official uniform of the comrades?  Check it out.  These guys need a lesson from brother Pootie on how to dress properly.  Or maybe they’re just trying to connect with the kiddies on university campuses?

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Hugo Chavez

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Fidel Castro

 

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